On my drive to the office today, I was revisiting some parts of my recent life, replaying highlight (and lowlight) reels. Asking myself some questions. I was asking for some guidance in some cases, clarity in others, and in still others, the grace to totally forgive, let go, and move on.
At one moment, I was in the inventory portion of the process, remembering some people who have formerly been in my life and left one way or another. I was questioning myself (as I’m prone to), examining my motivations in some cases, feeling a little sad or disappointed in others, and in many cases KNOWING that what was best, had happened.
Cue the music to accompany this part…. The James Gang- WALK AWAY… I laughed right out loud.
That the perfect song pops up at the perfect moment is not a new thing for me at all, but no matter how often it happens, I’m often a bit surprised.
Yesterday, I was talking to a client about the death of her (too-young) dog. As we talked, I was sharing that because of the 32+ 4-legged people who live at Hotel Caledonia, in the house or the barn, that I’m no stranger to the circle of life coming around all too often.
I shared the story of a day, a couple of years ago, that two beautiful horses who had been born in Beth’s barn and had lived their entire, and very long lives, under her care, had come to the time when the vet needed to come out and help them across the bridge.
When I know that an exit is coming, I will work with each one, do energy work, help to prep them for the process. It seems to help them be calm and ready. It also helps me feel like I’ve done something to honor them, and prepare them for their exits.
I tend to speak to them in terms of what they might find on the other side. That old friends, both human and otherwise will likely be there to greet them, and that as they leave their tired, old, broken bodies, that they will be able to once again run and play in the heavenly pastures.
It seems as if I’ve created a bit of a verbal picture of where they are going.
With Sarge and Nina, it was two exits back-to-back. They had been together for their entire lives, and were the barn equivalent of boyfriend/girlfriend. However, Sarge had a wandering eye, and any new mare who came to the herd, would distract him as he’d make a play.
But when his interest was rebuffed, there would stand Nina to forgive him and take him back.
She apparently vowed to stand by his side and take care of him until the end.
At least that is what I sensed, so I asked the Vet to take Sarge first. I feared that if we put Nina in a position where she felt she was not being true to that vow, we could have our hands full.
It all went off without a hitch. Our vet is an amazing man. As we stand there, the sense of kindness and reference is palpable. He always talks me through the process, and reminds me that there is absolutely no pain, and that each one is gone before their knees buckle and they crumble to the ground.
It doesn’t make it easy, and I hope that it NEVER becomes easy to say goodbye. But it makes it tolerable.
So when we were done, with tears threatening to overspill my eyes, I got in my Jeep to head back to the house, and then on to my office.
As soon as I turned the key, a new song started on the radio. One I’d not heard in a very long time. Wild Horses by the Rolling Stones. That was all it took. I was toast… eyes leaking, but with an image of those wild horses that had just been freed from their tired old bodies, galloping across the meadow with old and new friends.
I love music! More and more, I pay attention to what is being presented as the soundtrack to whatever is going on at the moment. It is often extremely accurate and powerful.
I’d love it, if you’d share your experiences and stories about your magical soundtrack in the comment section.